Diary of a vibrator

Vibrators are people too, you know. Okay, not really. But they do have feelings. Fine, they don’t. But they give us feelings (that we absolutely love). We wanted to know what life looked like from their point of view. And a sneak peek into the diary of a vibrator led us to some pretty amazing findings... 

Dear diary, 

...I’ve been shoved behind this side-desk drawer all day. You see, her parents have come to visit, so naturally she would refuse to acknowledge my presence. Is she embarrassed of me? But I’m such a people-pleaser! Literally…

...If she really wanted to hide me from them, she could’ve come up with creative, less-obvious hiding places, not the go-to side drawer which is infested with condoms and that sexy fur handcuff I so have a crush on...

...I wonder why people keep complaining about occasionally getting wet in the monsoon rain. On the other hand, whenever I get people wet (and it’s pretty damn often), they just love it, if you know what I mean… 

...I don’t understand these reassuring humans, their vocabulary seems limited to ‘aah’ and ‘yes’. But whatever you say, my master is such a good religious woman with so much passion that she screams out “oh my god’ with so much ecstasy, such a devotee she is...

...These days I feel so good about myself. I’d like to think I’m multi-talented. Just the other week she pulled me out with so much tension and made me vibrate all over her head. I am proud to say that I am a certified substitute for headache pills...oh, and Viagra...

...I am going to take this opportunity to clarify that I’m sick of eating dil-doughs, I’d appreciate a banana or a popsicle once in a while after all that shaking workout I do. I might not be handy, but I am useful... 

...They say early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise. That’s my aspiration, but my job requires me to do night shifts, like a watchman. The sole difference between them and I is the fact that I’m a substitute for men...

...Truth is, I think I’m the best she’s ever had. I am never crooked or have erectile problems cause I’m ever-presently turned-on by all that life has to offer. I am never crooked and always bigger than expected. All I can say now is Go big or go home!...

So now, when you’re placing your next order on http://imbesharam.com, you know exactly what your vibrator will do to please your woman. Happy shopping!